Do you have the habit of playing the negative tapes over and over in your mind? Do you listen to the naysayers and have a habit of sabotaging your capabilities? But, do you want to change this habit of yours? So, how to become mentally strong?

Everyone aspires to be stronger than they were a year ago. Whether we talk about physical strength or being mentally and emotionally stronger, to deal with the ups and downs of life you have to be strong. Life is a complex amalgamation of roses and thorns. You have to be able to overcome the thorns to enjoy the pleasure of roses.

To survive the uncertain times of life and to avoid indulging in self-destructive behavior you need to develop your own strength. So, here’s a list of 6 habits that will help you flourish even when life engulfs you with challenges. But, first, let me highlight the importance of being mentally strong and its benefits.

Why is it important to be strong?

Before starting out on any physical or mental health regimen it is always wiser to know about the benefits and the potential risks associated with it. Luckily in this case being mentally strong comes with no risks but a plethora of benefits.

According to Amy Morin, author of ’13 things mentally strong people don’t do, being mentally strong not only helps you in dealing with the rough patches in life. But also makes you more confident in your abilities. It makes you more resilient to deal effectively with failures.

Also, it redirects your focus on the things you have control over thereby allowing you to perform to your utmost potential. It makes you more accepting of the fact that life unfolds the way it pleases. You don’t have much control over the things happening to you in life. But one thing you have complete control over is how you respond in such situations.

Life is a mixture of highs and lows but between these are the mundane and ordinary things. The trick to living an extraordinary life is in cherishing the highs, staying hopeful through the lows, and enjoying the mundane.

Lastly, it gives you a sense of satisfaction because of practicing greater self-acceptance. You no longer beat yourself up and waste your time dwelling over the bad decisions made in past.

I can go over and over the benefits of being mentally stronger, however, it is easier said than done. It is always hard to change the way you feel, think, or act but it is not impossible. Gaining mental strength requires training the mental muscle consistently. It takes years to build that strength and a lot of practice later to maintain it. But, increasing your mental strength can help you achieve the greatest which you have ever dreamed of.

5 powerful habits to become strong

Your mind is your greatest asset or your worst enemy. If you want to flip the coin and get rid of the self-sabotaging habits you need to practice the following habits.

1- Leave the bad weather behind

Quoting here one of my favorite lines,

‘Wherever you go, no matter what the weather always bring your own sunshine.’

Sometimes thinking about the incidents and memories of the past seem to be tempting. Whether they are good old memories we made in school or the pleasant time spent with an ex-partner. Cherishing the good memories seems like a good time passing. But remembering unpleasant events and mistakes is not healthy.

The past is gone however good or bad the memories associated with it. But, you need to focus on the present and anticipate the future. Cherish the good old memories and learn from past mistakes instead. Dwelling over them won’t change them. You cannot go in the past and change every bad decision into good. But what you can do is learn from them and avoid committing the same mistakes in the future.

Trust me on this, the days coming ahead has a lot more to offer than those behind you.

Related; How to stay calm in stressful situations

2- Change is the ultimate truth

Life is a long journey. It is bound to change along the course. Resisting the change or wanting the present moment to never end is not possible.

Resisting change makes life even more complicated. Think for a while, can you stay in school forever because you have some awesome friends there? Can you stay young your whole life? No, life will evolve and change.

So, what can you do about it? You have to have a flexible approach to life. Embracing the change would help you to move along easily and stay relevant.

Being fearful of what the future holds might be helpful in giving you that edge. For it will compel you to prepare for the change and higher your performance potential. This is why people are advised to prepare 5 years ahead of time. Because you never know what the future holds.

But if you make timely decisions, learn along the way and embrace the change only then you would be able to navigate the unfamiliar territory.

3- Set healthy boundaries and never compromise on it

One of the key ingredients of strong humans is that they are in control of themselves. They know what is acceptable and what is not. Their actions are in line with their values. Therefore, they do not allow anyone else to cross that boundary and demean them.

People with strong personalities know how to say ‘no’ when something doesn’t inspire them. To sum it up they are complete humans who know that they are the authority over themselves. They don’t give away their power and nothing they do is out of compulsion. But they do whatever they want keeping in mind the pros and cons of it.

Now the question which may have come to you is ‘what is a weak-minded person?’ A person who gets easily influenced by others, does whatever others suggest, and has no personal opinions is weak-minded. It is necessary to set healthy boundaries for a weak person to become strong.

So, never compromise on your self-esteem even for the people closest to you. Realize that you have control over your life and choose what you wish to do.

Related; Why self-esteem is important in life

4- Don’t be afraid to take risks

Being cautious while embarking on a new journey is important to limit the chances of failure. But, to avoid starting anything new due to the fear of failure is an utterly emotional decision.

People with a strong mind never hide behind the fear of failure. They know how to take calculated risks every now and then. They know how to be cautious yet endearing. Mentally strong people weigh the pros and cons of any decision before deciding in favor or against it.

You can replace emotion with logic by carefully assessing the decision. After you clear the fog of confusion within your mind you can easily assess the level of risk. Try asking yourself these questions before giving in to fear. What are the pros and cons of this decision? How will I benefit from it? Are there any other options? Or, will it matter in the coming years?

So, whether you are thinking about a career change, starting out on a new activity, or planning to start your business. Know that everything has certain risk factors associated with it. But, taking a step is better than sitting idle and regretting your decision later.
After all, nothing ventured is nothing gained!

5- Get rid of the people-pleasing attitude

Do you find it hard to say no to people? Do you strive to make everyone around you happy? or do you worry about disappointing others? If the answer to all these questions was ‘yes’ then perhaps you are a people pleaser!

However hard you may try to please everybody it is not really possible. There will always be someone unhappy with the way you talk, walk, or treat people. There will always be someone monitoring and criticizing your next move.

Get rid of the belief that you are responsible for someone’s feelings. Get rid of the temptation of controlling people’s emotions. You can’t please everyone in the room.

While pleasing one might be displeasing others it is wiser to decide who you want to please. Be it your spouse, your boss, or your dad. Choose wisely because you would be investing a lot of energy in this process.

List the people who really matter to you. Work on your relationship with them and stop assuming that people care about your every single move.

6- Don’t compare your life with others

Strong-minded people are highly focused on their goals and ambitions in life. They literally have no time to think about the lifestyle and blessings of other people, let alone compare themselves to others.

Comparing yourself to others has some serious repercussions on your mental health. You not only desire to gain the same things as they have. But you also are low-key angry about why they got it in the first place. Then begins the vicious cycle of overthinking and over-analyzing everything that came to you in life. 

Now, let me clear the air for you, Life is not fair. It isn’t to anyone either. Stop judging someone by their outward possessions. I know for a fact that people only flaunt the highs in their lives. No one tells you about their struggles and challenges. At least till the time, they haven’t made anything out of it.

So keep this thing in mind. Never judge a book by its cover. People might look happy and successful outwardly but you don’t know about their inward battles. Never compare your life to someone else’s because it will only result in resentment and lower your life satisfaction.

You need to focus on your goals so that one day when you look back you are proud of the journey you had.

How to stay positive

7- People owe you nothing

Relying on others to make you feel happy is as bad as taking responsibility for everyone else’s happiness. You are responsible for your own life. Remember that you are the authority over your life.

People owe you nothing. Being friends with someone doesn’t mean that they would be there for you every time you are in trouble. You have to be sufficient enough to figure out the solutions yourself. They might help you once, twice, or maybe thrice, and that too out of courtesy.

But, they won’t be available at your service every time just because they are friends with you. You don’t deserve anything because of who you are. But you only get on the basis of what you do.

Feeling a sense of entitlement is not a desirable trait. Stop looking at yourself from a victim’s perspective and muster up the courage to take responsibility for your life. No one is responsible for your happiness or success. You are the controller of your life. The sooner you realize this the better focused and motivated you are to deal with the challenges of life.

8- How to become strong-Learn from your mistakes

Dwelling on the mistakes of the past is a mentally taxing habit. It not only forbids you to enjoy the present moments to the fullest. But you also sabotage the potential of the blessings that the future holds.

Remembering the bad decisions of the past can be turned into a learning opportunity. Only if you figure out the loopholes of your previous decisions you would be able to turn the upcoming challenges into opportunities. Now that’s what you need to do to be strong.

Every famous and successful person in the course of history has been through a lot before they succeeded. But they did not allow the mistakes to be a source of a hindrance. Be it Thomas Edison or Jack Maa, they suffered a lot. However, being afraid of failure and dwelling over them aimlessly was never an option for them.

So, to be strong you need to analyze and learn from your mistakes to perform better next time.

9- Be your own best friend

Coming to my favorite part, Be your own best friend. Learning how to enjoy time alone, is very important to figure out what you want from life. People who are mentally strong are never afraid of spending some time alone, subdued in their thoughts.

Just as your phone needs time to recharge every day, you also need to recharge your battery by having some quiet time alone. Either you go for a walk in the evening, have a long drive with the music turned off or you decide to take yourself for a date. Keeping all the electronics away is the key to spending quality time with yourself.

To be strong you have to take a break from the stressors of life. You are not wasting time but only pampering yourself which you truly deserve. So, the next time you feel weak you need to relax for a while and give yourself time to recharge.

Related; 11 simple ways to be happy with yourself

10- How to become strong-Take it one step at a time

There are times when you are too excited to change your life and you would venture into too many things at a time. But, that won’t yield any results either. Giving your 100 percent to a single task is always more beneficial than giving your 50 percent to two tasks.

Choose how you invest your time and energy. Prioritize what you truly want in life. Make a list and take it one step at a time. There’s no need to rush because it only wields incomplete and unsatisfactory output.

Be patient about the results and monitor your progress throughout. You can’t expect immediate outcomes nor would you gain your desired results at times. But, being patient about life is the key to being happy when you are showered with blessings. So, always bear in mind that real things take time.

Don’t rush to complete anything hurriedly only to regret it later. But, be patient and cater to one thing at a time.

Related; How to stay motivated in life


Being mentally strong is a trait we all wish to possess but working to be that strong and maintaining it is hard. Just as physical strength requires consistency, mental strength also demands commitment. So, if you want to be strong you need to exercise your mental muscle and make effort to maintain them.

However, if you follow these ten tips listed above your journey of gaining mental strength will be a lot easier. Try these out and let us know how they benefited you in the comments below.

About the Author

Sara Khan

Sara Khan is a writer, fashion designer, and entrepreneur. She aims to inspire and motivate people to live, love, and laugh wholeheartedly.

View All Articles